Sex on a Spoon

Ah, risotto. Rich, creamy, open to endless variations–it is perhaps the most wonderful thing that can be done with rice. But have you ever seen risotto on a menu in Charleston? Hey, me neither. I’ve heard the urban food legend about risotto once being on the menu at Blossom. But these days, if you want risotto around here you’re probably going to have to make it yourself. So, why is risotto an endangered item on restaurant menus? Well, I can think of a few reasons, but here’s the biggie: while risotto only takes about 20 minutes to cook, for those 20 minutes it requires the chef’s undivided attention. Not many restaurants can afford to keep a chef working on a single dish for that long.

Thankfully, risotto isn’t difficult to prepare at home. All it requires are few good ingredients, a little technique and some time. If you’ve never tried it, there are some wonderful resources on the internet like this one that will walk you through the process step by step. It all starts with arborio rice from Italy. IMPORTANT: you can’t use just any ol’ kind of rice for this. There are options available, but for now, just stick with arborio. It’s not hard to track down, but like many mid-range food items, you’re not going to find it at Wal-Mart.

Another thing about risotto: you must absolutely have everything ready to go before you start. It’s not much–butter (that’s right, hippies), diced onion, chopped mushrooms (fresh and dried), the reserved water they were reconstituted in, chopped parsley and grated Parmigiano Reggiano cheese. And of course, two other essential ingredients (not exactly pictured)–a glass of white wine and 5 or so cups of homemade stock. I make my own duck stock, then reduce it way down and do the Julia Child trick–freeze it like ice cubes. But alas, that’s another post.

Only after you have your meez squared away can you begin. Sweat the onions in a generous amount of butter with a pinch of salt. When they become translucent, jack the heat up to medium-high and add the rice. From this point on, you must stir constantly. You cannot leave the stove, period. No changing the CD. No leaving to see what’s happening on ‘American Chopper’ or ‘Idol.’ Stir constantly–you want the rice to toast slightly, but the onions should take on no color at all. After about a minute, when everything smells nice and nutty, add at least a glass of that wine you’re drinking, and the mushrooms. Keep the heat as high as you can without letting things burn. Continue to stir until the rice absorbs almost all of the wine. After that happens, add almost all of the reserved broth from the mushrooms (being careful NOT to pour in the sediment), stirring gently and constantly until it is nearly all cooked away. It won’t be long. As you’ll see, arborio rice will absorb an amazing amount of liquid.

Now– set a timer for 15 minutes. From this point on, things are very straightforward. Add the hot stock or broth to the pan one ladle at a time until it’s almost absorbed; then add another ladle–you know where this is going. Do I have to remind you to never stop stirring? Enjoy it. Find your quiet place. Think about that novel you’re going to write. Drink what’s left of that bottle of wine.As you add the broth, the rice’s outer layer of starch will disolve, producing the creamy goodness you’re after.

When 15 minutes have elapsed, start tasting the risotto. You’re looking for texture. The risotto should be creamy, and the individual rice grains should be al dente–firm to the bite, but not crunchy. It should take about 3 more minutes. Keep adding stock. If you run out, use hot water. When all is well, stir in at least 1/4 cup of the grated Parmigiano.

If you’re really feeling like a cowboy, add a knob of butter. Salt and pepper to taste; garnish with the remaining cheese and the chopped parsley. See what a mere 20 minutes in front of a stove will get you?

Pictured above: Sex on a spoon.

Blogger Josh’s Wild Mushroom Risotto for 2

Butter (a lot)
1 cup arborio rice (find at Kroger)
5 cups homemade stock or broth, or one 32 ounce carton of store bought organic low sodium chicken broth + 1 cup water. Whichever you use, keep it hot on the stove as you add it to the risotto. If you run out, use hot water.
1 glass of white wine
1/2 sweet onion, finely chopped
1/2 cup grated Parmigiano Reggiano cheese. Please. Even Wal-Mart has this–don’t make me turn the car around.
1/4 cup diced shiitake mushrooms–or fresh morels, if you can find them (dream a little dream).
Around 1/4 reconstituted dried mushrooms. Dried porcini, morels or portobella all work well. Use a couple of different kinds if possible. Soak them in a cup of warm water for at least an hour. Save the water–that’s mushroom broth now. Except for the grit at the bottom–that’s sand.
1/4 cup chopped Italian parsley (at long last, and to much fanfare, finally available at the Ashton Place Kroger)

3 Responses to “Sex on a Spoon”

  1. maicomike Says:

    I’m not clear about the water used for reconstituting the mushrooms. Do you pour in the sediment or not? At one point you say to be careful to pour in the sediment, then when listing ingredients, you say that the stuff “in the bottom is sand.” I’m guessing the first reference was a typo, but can you help me out here? I want to try the recipe, but I want to get it right. Thanks.

  2. Josh Says:

    Yes, that is infact a typo. Sorry about the confusion. You do not want to pour in the grit that settles to the bottom. Some people even strain it, but hey, it’s dinner, not a culinary school exam, right? Have fun!

  3. maicomike Says:

    Thanks–it sounds great. I’ll try it soon.

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