Even more Spitzer comments…
I’m really enjoying the feedback from this one. It’s nice to know so many people are upset over this. I figured at least some people would admire Spitzer’s wife for being so devoted and determined to make her marriage work, but apparently not. By the way, if you want to comment without emailing me, just click on COMMENTS. But if you want to email, send it to karinfuller@cnpapers.com.
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Yesterday’s column was right on!! A lot of people have been asking the same thing of these “Stepford” wives…What in the world are you thinking? Or ARE you thinking? The Spitzer’s are raising 3 teenage girls–what message is this woman passing on to her GIRLS? To be a doormat for the man she marries? That’s it’s ok for your husband to do this kind of thing and stand with him, looking grief stricken? I’d like to whop this woman up side the head and get her to wake up. She has the upper hand here! She should take him to the bank for this . . . very public humiliation he has caused her. My butt would have been in the lawyer’s office, not at a press conference with him. The heck with his press conference and how it looked for HIM. It would have looked so much better for her.
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Dr. Phil had about half his show yesterday talking about the whole Spitzer thing, particularly about why his wife stood by him. I had to laugh because his wife, Robin, was really adamant saying no way would I ever stand beside you if you did something like that. I totally agree with her. One comment I thought was interesting was that he said that one of the reasons Hillary Clinton isn’t doing so well in the primaries is that America saw that she didn’t stand up for herself when Bill was going through the whole Monica Lewinsky thing, so how can they expect her to stand up for our country? It’s an interesting thought.
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This HAS to be affecting Hilary’s campaign. If you can’t even stand up for yourself, how do you do it for the country?
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Did you notice how Spitzer totally ignored his wife when she came out with him? Didn’t treat her with respect at all, didn’t look at her to make sure she was OK, even stuff like letting her walk in front of him, putting her hand behind her back, etc. He just acted like she wasn’t even there.
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Just think of how many women have now had the conversation with their husbands - “You do something like that, you’re on your OWN!”
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I can’t even begin to think that the Spitzers thought he would stay in a governor and that her standing there was politically motivated, so I don’t know why she did it. Now Hilary really didn’t have a choice politically. Here was the President of the US standing there saying that the only mistake was that he didn’t keep the dress and make Monica wear something else out. Broke moral laws, but no real laws with it… and he was going to stay President. This case was different–he was Governor and got caught doing something illegal and his Governor days were numbered (although I suppose some men are probably arguing that he was just contributing to the economy by purchasing services from an entrepreneur and that the trickle down effect could only help in these hard times….)
March 18th, 2008 at 3:32 pm
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March 19th, 2008 at 9:22 am
Eh… I just don’t know about this.
I have a hard time painting with such braod strokes. I agree that there’s a good chance that Spitzer was taking political and financial fallout into consideration when she stood by her husband at the press conference. And I agree that it would be a cold day in Hell before I stood in front of a phalanx of reporters with my cheating SOB of a husband, given the same situation.
But, here is a woman who has presumably just had the shock of a lifetime and who has to make decisions- has to strategize- on the fly. I just don’t think it’s that easy to determine what other people should do in, what has to be, an incredibly painful and confusing situation.
And, I am one of the few who believe that Bill and Hill share a deep and abiding love in spite of his transgressions. Maybe it’s a love born of political ambition or spurred on by power and wealth- I don’t know. I guess I want to believe in them the way that I want to believe that Rhett will come back to Scarlett, despite all of her obvious flaws.
I don’t say any of this for any kind of “stand by your man”, “stay for the kids” reasons. Rather, my point is that life is full of difficult decisions and I think for the most part, we do the best we can. I think a lot of times we’re sort of forced to choose between black and white, when everything inside us feels gray. You know?
Anyway- love, love, LOVE the blog!! (And the column.)
March 19th, 2008 at 2:37 pm
I don’t think it’s that broad a brush. What Spitzer’s husband did wasn’t some discreet one time fling, and unless she found out about it on the way to the conference in the car, I can’t imagine being so stunned she’d stand by him. This is an ivy-league educated mother of three. Surely that background would’ve helped her develop some thinking-on-your-feet skills. Besides, this is one of those situations that doesn’t seem to require extensive thought. It was blatantly wrong and disrespectful toward her, and her being there with him feels like she’s saying, “I accept this.”
March 24th, 2008 at 12:55 pm
Wow. This is a toughie. Whether I agreed to stay with my husband through such a crappy circumstance or not, I don’t think I could have stood there beside him to face the press. To me, there are just some moments that need to be handled privately. He is a public figure, granted, but that doesn’t take away her right to deal with this privately. I seem to remember when our own cloggy gov. got caught in the steamy email romance his wife sort of disappeared for a while. That made her human to me. Who wants to deal with dirty laundry in public? Anyone who has ever been hurt by a man knows that it’s a roller coaster ride. Maybe Lady Spitzer will leave him yet.