Due to the overwhelming response for more images like the one that started the model debate, Glamour took the conversation a step further in its November issue (on newsstands October 6) with a story entitled, “Oh. Wow. These Bodies are Beautiful.”  

To quote my new favorite magazine:

We at Glamour couldn’t agree more, and we’re listening hard to our readers’ call to action. “The public wants to see all types of models represented,” says Gary Dakin, vice president of client services at Ford Models. “This portrait [of the models on the first page] is an amazing step toward that.” It’s one step of many.  Here’s what you can expect to see in our pages going forward:  

• A continued commitment to showing a wide range of body types-and, of course, racial diversity-in our pages, including fashion and beauty stories.  

• A promise to give the best plus models not just work, but the same great work straight-size models get, partnering with top photographers, stylists and makeup artists. Because a generous helping of fantasy, in our view, is fabulous-as long as it’s extended to women of all sizes.  

• An ongoing celebration of the so-called imperfections, from nose bumps to gap teeth smiles, that make us all unique.  

• Enthusiastic support for any designer who manufactures chic clothes we can photograph on full-bodied models.

Glamour magazine commissioned famed fashion photographer Matthias Vriens-McGrath to shoot plus-size models Lizzie Miller, Crystal Renn, Kate Dillon, among others, in a style similar to the famous Herb Ritts of nude Supermodels from the 1980s. Their story gives a behind-the-scenes look at how modeling, particularly plus-size, really works in fashion magazines.

• A standard designer sample is a size 0 to 4, which means magazines can only feature the clothes on models that size.

• The definition of “plus-size” in the modeling industry isn’t necessarily the same as plus-size clothing. Any model over a size 6 is generally considered plus because she won’t fit into most designer samples, but plus-size clothing starts at size 14 or 16.

• Most designer collections run up to a size 10 or 12, even though the most popular dress size for American woman is a size 14.

• Michael Kors, Isaac Mizrahi for Liz Claiborne New York and Baby Phat represent a relatively small percentage of designers who make plus-sized collections in sizes beyond 14.

• There’s a shortage of models that are size 16+. Jennie Runk, a size 12, admits she’s often much smaller than the plus-size samples she models, so “I’ll sometimes wear padding. I travel with my own set. It’s a series of foam ovals and circles you can put on your butt, hips, waist or boobs so you can fit the clothes.” Jennie adds, “the true sign of a great designer is someone who can fit the curves.”

The photo says it all. These women are every bit as beautiful as the super skinny ones.

Photo Credit: Matthias Vriens-McGrath for GLAMOUR

DO THIN MODELS WARP GIRLS’ BODY IMAGE? 

By Nanci Hellmich, USA TODAY

When Frederique van der Wal, a former Victoria’s Secret model, attended designers’ shows during New York’s Fashion Week this month, she was “shocked” by the waiflike models who paraded down the catwalk. They seemed even skinnier than in previous years.

“This unnatural thinness is a terrible message to send out. The people watching the fashion shows are young, impressionable women,” says van der Wal, host of Cover Shot on TLC.

Psychologists and eating-disorder experts are worried about the same thing. They say the fashion industry has gone too far in pushing a dangerously thin image that women, and even very young girls, may try to emulate.

“We know seeing super-thin models can play a role in causing anorexia,” says Nada Stotland, professor of psychiatry at Rush Medical College in Chicago and vice president of the American Psychiatric Association. Because many models and actresses are so thin, it makes anorexics think their emaciated bodies are normal, she says. “But these people look scary. They don’t look normal.”

The widespread concern that model thinness has progressed from willowy to wasted has reached a threshold as evidenced by the recent actions of fashion show organizers.

The Madrid fashion show, which ended Saturday, banned overly thin models, saying it wanted to project beauty and health. Organizers said models had to be within a healthy weight range. That means a 5-foot-9 woman would need to weigh at least 125 pounds. 

Officials in India, Britain and Milan also have expressed concerns, but some experts say consumers in the USA will have to demand models with fuller figures for it to happen here.

“The promotion of the thin, sexy ideal in our culture has created a situation where the majority of girls and women don’t like their bodies,” says body-image researcher Sarah Murnen, professor of psychology at Kenyon College in Gambier, Ohio. “And body dissatisfaction can lead girls to participate in very unhealthy behaviors to try to control weight.”

Experts call these behaviors disordered eating, a broad term used to describe a range of eating problems, from frequent dieting to anorexia nervosa (which is self-starvation, low weight and fear of being fat) to bulimia nervosa (the binge-and-purge disorder).

Girls today, even very young ones, are being bombarded with the message that they need to be super-skinny to be sexy, says psychologist Sharon Lamb, co-author of Packaging Girlhood: Rescuing Our Daughters From Marketers’ Schemes. 

It used to be that women would only occasionally see rail-thin models, such as Twiggy, the ’60s fashion icon. “But now they see them every day. It’s the norm,” Lamb says, from ads, catalogs and magazines to popular TV shows such as America’s Next Top Model and Project Runway. “They are seeing skinny models over and over again.”

On top of that, gaunt images of celebrities such as Nicole Richie and Kate Bosworth are plastered on magazine covers, she says.

What worries Lamb most is that these images are filtering down to girls as young as 9 and 10. Some really sexy clothes are available in children’s size 6X, says Lamb, a psychology professor at Saint Michael’s College in Colchester, Vt. “Girls are being taught very young that thin and sexy is the way they want to be when they grow up, so they’d better start working on that now,” she says.

Lamb believes it’s fine for girls to want to feel sexy and pretty when they are teenagers, but that shouldn’t be their primary focus. “If they are spending all their time choosing the right wardrobe, trying to dance like an MTV backup girl and applying lip gloss, it robs them of other options.”

Some girls don’t want to participate in sports because they’re afraid they’ll bulk up. Some won’t try to play an instrument such as a trombone because it doesn’t fit their image of what a “girly girl” should do, she says. 

IT BEGINS IN YOUTH

There’s no question younger girls are getting this message, says Murnen, who has studied this for 15 years. “We have done studies of grade-school girls, and even in grade 1, girls think the culture is telling them that they should model themselves after celebrities who are svelte, beautiful and sexy.”

Some girls can reject that image, but it’s a small percentage: 18% in Murnen’s research. Those girls were shown to have the highest body esteem. Murnen and her colleagues reviewed 21 studies that looked at the media’s effect on more than 6,000 girls, ages 10 and older, and found those who were exposed to the most fashion magazines were more likely to suffer from poor body images.

Societies throughout the ages have had different ideals for female beauty, says Katie Ford, chief executive officer of Ford Models, whose megastar models include Christie Brinkley and Rachel Hunter. “You can look as far back as Greek statues and paintings and see that. It’s part of women’s fantasy nature,” Ford says. “The question is: When does that become destructive?”

She doesn’t buy into the idea that fashion models are creating a cult of thinness in the USA. “The biggest problem in America is obesity. Both obesity and anorexia stem from numerous issues, and it would be impossible to attribute either to entertainment, be it film, TV or magazines.”

ANATOMY OF A RUNWAY MODEL

This year’s fashion shows in New York featured a mix of figure types, some of them a little more womanly and some thin, says Ford, whose agency had about 20 models in shows of top designers, including Ralph Lauren, Bill Blass, Marc Jacobs and Donna Karan. “Our models who did very well this season were not super-skinny. However, there were some on the runway who were very thin.” 

Cindi Leive, editor in chief of Glamour magazine, says some models were teens who hadn’t developed their curves yet, which is one reason they appeared so thin. “You do see the occasional model on the runway looking like she should go from the fashion show to the hospital. You hear stories of girls who come to model and are collapsing because they haven’t eaten in days. Any responsible model booker will tell you they turn away girls who get too thin.”

Runway models have to have a certain look, says Kelly Cutrone, owner of People’s Revolution, a company that produces fashion shows around the world. Her company produced 16 fashion shows in New York, including one for designer Marc Bouwer.

The runway models this year were no thinner than years before, she says. “I didn’t see any difference in the girls at all. When they bend over, are you going to see the rib cage? Yes, they are thin naturally.” 

Women shouldn’t be comparing themselves with these girls, she says. “These girls are anomalies of nature. They are freaks of nature. They are not average. They are naturally thin and have incredibly long legs compared to the rest of their body. Their eyes are wide set apart. Their cheekbones are high.”

Most runway models are 14 to 19, with an average age of 16 or 17, she says. Some are older. Many are 5-foot-10 or 5-foot-11. They average 120 to 124 pounds. They wear a size 2 or 4. “If we get a girl who is bigger than a 4, she is not going to fit the clothes,” Cutrone says. “Clothes look better on thin people. The fabric hangs better.” 

Stephanie Schur, designer of her own line, Michon Schur, had her first official runway show in New York a few weeks ago. When she was casting models, she looked for women who had “a nice glow, a healthy look.” 

She encountered a few models who looked unhealthy. “They tend to be extremely pale, have thin hair and don’t have that glow.”

But many of today’s runway models look pretty much alike, Schur says. “They are all pretty girls, but no one really stands out. For runway it’s about highlighting the clothes. It’s finding the girls that make your clothes look best.”

Schur says she doesn’t believe many young girls today are going to try to imitate what they see on the fashion runways. She says they are more likely to look to actresses for their ideal body image. 

It’s not surprising that women want to be slender and beautiful, because as a society “we know more about women who look good than we know about women who do good,” says Audrey Brashich, a former teen model and author of All Made Up: A Girl’s Guide to Seeing Through Celebrity Hype and Celebrating Real Beauty.

For several years, Brashich worked for Sassy and YM magazines and read thousands of letters from girls and teens who wanted to become a famous model, actress or singer.

And no wonder, she says. “As a culture, we are on a first-name basis with women like Paris Hilton or Nicole Richie,” she says. “The most celebrated, recognizable women today are famous primarily for being thin and pretty, while women who are actually changing the world remain comparatively invisible. Most of us have a harder time naming women of other accomplishments.” The idolizing of models, stars and other celebrities is not going to change “until pop culture changes the women it celebrates and focuses on.” 

WOMEN COME IN ALL SIZES

Glamour’s Leive believes the media have a powerful influence on women’s body images and a responsibility to represent women of all sizes. “We do not run photos of anybody in the magazine who we believe to be at an unhealthy weight. We frequently feature women of all different sizes. We all know that you can look fabulous in clothes without being a size 2.”

Ford believes the trend next year will be to move toward more womanly figures. Model van der Wal agrees and says she’s trying to include women of varying figure types in Cover Shot. “Women come in lots of different sizes and shapes, and we should encourage and celebrate that.”

Cutrone says models will become heavier if that’s what consumers demand. “If people decide thin is out, the fashion industry won’t have thin models anymore. Have you spent time with fashion people? They are ruthless. They want money. 

“And the one thing they know is people want clothes to cover their bodies,” Cutrone says. “Unfortunately, most people aren’t comfortable with their bodies.”

Super Skinny Models: This Is What The Fashion Industry Calls “Curves”? 

Some members of the fashion industry were patting themselves on the back last week with claims that there were more “curves and smiles” on the Fashion Week runways this year. (See AP article below.) We beg to differ. What we saw on the runways was more of the same: women so thin they not only made us gasp in disbelief, but also made us forget to look at the clothes (which can’t be good for business). Here are a few of the ultra-thin girls the top designers dressed this season, and because it’s the designer who should be taken to task for promoting these dangerous standards, we cropped the heads out of these images to protect the models’ identities. Some of them are barely 14 years old, after all. 

By Megan K. Scott for Associated Press:

NEW YORK — If model thin is always in, at least there were fewer protruding collar bones and ribs to be counted at New York Fashion Week.

Models were up to sizes 2 and 4 _ not 0, according to Nian Fish, chair of a fashion designers health initiative. Designers rejected prepubescent 13-year-olds. And at least one super-thin model who had the audience talking a few seasons ago was noticeably absent.

“I think a lot of the direction from the designers has been a much healthier approach,” said James Aguiar, co-host of Ultra HD’s “Full Frontal Fashion,” who noticed more curves and smiles on the runway.

Avril Graham, executive fashion and beauty editor at Harper’s Bazaar, also saw a healthier look and more diversity: “We’re obviously going through a season of a less cookie cutter look.”

That is a small relief to those who have brought attention to the cause of eating disorders in the fashion world, though many say there’s a long way to go.

“I saw a few that looked better,” said Finola Hughes, host of “How Do I Look?” on the Style Network. “I actually saw some breasts, which was great. But there was one show I went to and everyone looked really skinny.”

The question of how thin is too thin has been tossed around since Kate Moss made her modeling debut 20 years ago, ushering in an era of “heroin chic.” In 2006, at least two models died from complications linked to eating disorders, which prompted some in Europe to try to ban skinny models from the runway.

Efforts were more modest in the United States. The Council of Fashion Designers of America held workshops on eating disorders and recommended that designers keep models under 16 off the runway, offer healthier snacks backstage and require those identified as having an eating disorder to seek professional help if they want to continue modeling.

“I think there’s progress,” said Fish, creative consultant for KCD Worldwide, which produces fashion shows and events. “The girls are still slim. We didn’t want them not to be slim. We wanted a projection of health.”

Some critics consider the industry’s efforts lacking because they still let skinny winnies rule the runways — while the models suffer to become walking hangers.

As a new model at 15, Coco Rocha said she went to Singapore and lost 10 pounds in six weeks. When she returned to the U.S. she was so obsessed with food, she beat herself up over eating an apple.

“I’ll never forget the piece of advice I got from people in the industry when they saw my new body,” she wrote in an e-mail to The Associated Press. “They said, ‘You need to lose more weight. The look this year is anorexia. We don’t want you to be anorexic but that’s what we want you to look like.’”

Rocha is one of the few models to speak out about the issue, even as ultra-thin models find their way into pro-anorexia “Thinspiration” videos. The question isn’t just about model health; it’s about who will win the hearts and minds of the teenagers and young girls who look up to them.

Young girls can now see more realistic shapes on television, from the Dove Campaign for Real Beauty to the plus-size winner on “America’s Next Top Model.” And models have largely disappeared from the covers of magazines, replaced by celebrities who generate their own is-she-too-thin headlines.

But that doesn’t mean models aren’t influencing girls and women.

Carol Weston, advice columnist for Girls’ Life Magazine, said she gets letters from tween girls who want to models or are looking for weight-loss advice. Modeling “seems so glamorous,” she said. She said many teenagers confess that they starve themselves, purge or use diet pills.

Eating disorders groups have recommended requiring adult models to have a body mass index of at least 18.5 — the lower limits of a normal weight =– and an independent medical certification affirming that they do not suffer from an eating disorder.

“They do drug testing for sports. Why? To keep competition clean but hopefully also to save lives. That’s what we want, too,” said Lynn Grefe, CEO of the National Eating Disorders Association.

But such measures are called Draconian by Dr. Susan Ice, a medical director for an eating disorders treatment center and member of the Council of Fashion Designers of America health initiative.

For now, the goal is simply to raise awareness, said CFDA president Diane von Furstenberg.

“I think that it’s a good thing to do it the way we’re doing it as opposed to throwing those poor girls on a scale and terrifying them even more,” she said.

Because of the initiative, some models were identified as having an eating disorder, referred for treatment and are back on the runways, Fish said. Some who didn’t look healthy weren’t used.

There has been some pressure for designers to increase their model size to a 6, but the designers prefer models whose modest curves don’t compete with the clothes, Fish said. London recently dropped its plan to require medical exams for models because of a lack of international support.

“Thin is going to be the ruling look –until someone says, ‘I want voluptuous,’” said Fish. “I don’t know if that ever is going to come back.” 

A few Sundays back, I wrote about the stir created after Glamour magazine featured a picture of a model who was a few pounds heavier than the ones most of us are accustomed to seeing. Glamour’s readers were thrilled by the picture, and the magazine was soon inundated with letters and emails from delighted readers.

And for the most part, the feedback I received about the column was equally enthusiastic.  All but one.

“I can tell you that personally, the last thing I want to see when I open a fashion magazine is ‘reality,’” wrote Liza in a comment on my Gazz blog. “If I want to see overweight, common, unfashionable women, I need look no further than any street at any time of day, anywhere in this state.” 

Liza wrote that she reads magazines like Vogue, Harpers, and Glamour because she loves style and beauty, as well as the mystique and art of fashion and fashion models. “When it comes to selling magazines, it’s the 5′10″ 110 lb. model that sells them,” says Liza.

The fashion industry has been pushing their skeletal=beauty equation ever since Twiggy in the 60s, and since then, young women have been starving (and up-chucking) themselves to death in the pursuit of meeting those unhealthy standards.

From a financial perspective, I don’t understand the thinking of those in the fashion industry. To me, the reason for using models that are shaped more like average women seems obvious: Women know that what looks good on a pencil isn’t likely to look as good on a highlighter. But if an outfit works on a model who is shaped more like the average woman, then the average woman is more likely to want to purchase that outfit.

But Liza disagreed with that, too. “Designers don’t want heavy women wearing their fashions. That’s why you can’t get Prada in an 18. It’s just the reality of high fashion–the greatest creation in the world is lost on a wide backside, and that’s just a sad fact of life. Besides, designers are all about exclusivity, and given that most American women are overweight, ultra thin is exclusive. Sad reality.”

It hasn’t always been that way, though. In paintings from the 19th century and earlier, beautiful women were full-figured, Rubenesque. Even into the 1950s, celebrities were curvaceous.

To be skinny was seen as unhealthy and therefore dangerous, and to such a degree that thinness was shocking. Since shocking meant getting noticed, advertising gurus took note and made use of it, as did fashion designers. In the mid-1990s, when skinny alone was no longer enough to draw attention, it was taken to the next level with heroin chic–even more severely jutting bones, pale skin, and dark circles under the eyes. A look reflective of drug addiction.

If advertisers and designers are paying attention, perhaps some will be savvy enough to realize that featuring an average-sized woman in ads has become every bit as shocking and attention-getting as Twiggy and those heroin chic chicks once were.

It’s interesting to consider how much of what we like or believe to be attractive and important is shaped by television, movies, and magazines. In the 1950s, Marilyn Monroe-a size 14-was the epitome of sexy. Then along came Twiggy. 

In the 1950s, men were predominantly clean-shaven. Mustaches and beards were viewed as an indicator of shiftiness or danger (think of the criminal landlord twirling his handlebar mustache). Then along came Burt Reynolds and Tom Selleck with their manly mustaches, and the public’s perception toward facial hair changed. 

Used to be that men who were losing their hair resorted to toupees, comb-overs, or hats, until Yul Brynner and Telly Sevalas came along and demonstrated how good hairless could look.

I can’t help but hope that the days of uber-thin models are nearing an end, that a healthier trend will begin. I doubt Liza would agree.

Though she did have a point.

“There’s a happy medium somewhere between toothpick models and the overweight of this country,” wrote Liza. “But if you need fashion magazines to validate yourself, then you have bigger problems than body image issues. If you accept yourself for what you are, then you shouldn’t care what the magazines say.” 

From an article in BUST magazine… 

STEP IN THE RIGHT DIRECTION

Three models spurred controversy when they brought some realism to the runway. These “curvy” (aka normal) women appeared alongside stick-figure thin models in Mark Fast’s London Fashion Week show last Saturday. The biggest shocker is that their inclusion prompted Fast’s stylist and creative designer to walk out over ‘’creative differences.’’ The reasoning behind Fast’s casting was that he “wanted women to know they didn’t have to be a size zero to wear a Mark Fast dress.” (Image from The Daily News)

It had happened to me before, but I’m a slow study, so I fell victim again. 

“Hey there!” the friendly woman said as we crossed paths in the restroom, with her taking the stall I’d just left. 

“Hi,” I said, turning to see if she was someone I knew, but the door was already closed. 

“So how ya’ doing?” she asked while I was washing my hands. “Been into anything interesting lately?”

“Not especially,” I said. “How about you?”

When she didn’t answer for a while, yet was not exactly silent, I said, “Wow. Sounds like you had a lot of coffee this morning.”

“Just a second, Stacy,” said the voice. “Hey-sorry. I wasn’t talking to you. I’m on a call with someone.”

“Sorry,” I said quickly, then hurried out. 

I miss the good old days when it was easy to tell the difference between crazies who were walking around talking to themselves and the people wearing Bluetooth headsets and talking to an actual person.

And I especially miss the good old days when a business call didn’t necessarily mean the person calling was doing their business.

I’m as guilty of extreme multitasking as the next overtaxed person, so I can certainly understand the desire to make use of what was previously just plain down time. But making phone calls from the restroom while seated in that way is one line I won’t cross.

I heard a story on All Things Considered last year about a man who accidentally dropped his Blackberry in airplane toilet. He quickly reached in and retrieved his phone from the swirling pool of dark blue liquid, then cleaned it up as good as he could. The phone still worked well enough that he was able to call his wife as he exited the plane. 

It wasn’t until after he’d shaken hands with his client that he learned the blue dye from the phone’s short time in the bowl had been transferred to his face.

I’m not a big fan of cell phones. I understand the convenience, the safety factor, and all the other selling points, but there’s something about being unreachable that appeals to both me and my husband.

It wasn’t until recently that he and I got a cell phone to share. That was four months ago. We haven’t been able to find it for three. I’m not sure either of us has really bothered to look, probably because we feel like hypocrites for owning one consider all the complaining we do about them.

I get annoyed every time I’m behind one of those distracted drivers with a head tilted at that telling angle most use when on a call. Most of them don’t even know they’re weaving outside of their lane. I get especially aggravated when those drivers have a kid or two in the car. Aside from the safety issues, there are few places better for talking with children then when you have them held captive that way.

And while most cell users seem to have grown accustomed to turning off their ringers during movies and live performances, they seem oblivious to how distracting their constant texting can be. That rapid two-handing clicking and brightly lit screen are hard to ignore.

One of my biggest cell peeves is those who take calls and conduct long conversations while out with another person.

While eating dinner at our favorite Mexican restaurant recently, one of the two women seated directly across from us received a call. Like us, they had just placed their order, and we watched as the one woman’s phone conversation continued until the food arrived, as the food was eaten, and even after the bill was brought and left on the table. It was only when her dinner companion stood up to pay that she got off the phone.

Still, all the recent technological advances with cell phones are impressive. There’s so much they can do.

It’s just a shame that where manners are concerned, there’s not an app for that, too.

“We got one of those midnight phone calls last night,” my friend said. “It was our neighbor. They had a squirrel in their house.”

Turns out my friend’s husband has a reputation for being the go-to guy for random critter removal.

“Did he get it?” I asked.

“Yeah,” she said. “He just walked over and grabbed it by the tail. It bit him three times.”

If someone grabbed my tail, they’d get the same. 

Had I known of his gift for vermin removal, I could’ve called him several years back when we had a squirrel in our attic. 

The industrious squirrel had taken advantage of a missing slat in a vent to gain access to our attic. Judging by the size of the nest she built between rafters, it was clear she was expecting a good number of guests (either that or she’d heard about the “nut” who lived at our house and was contemplating taking a human hostage to feast on over the winter).

Regardless of her motives, the squirrel had to go, but as animal lovers, we wanted a gentle removal. Fixing the vent resulted in soon having to plug her chewed holes. She wasn’t going to go easily. 

I tried to coerce (force might be a more accurate word) one of our cats into the attic, thinking fresh cat scent might frighten the squirrel, but it would’ve been easier to thread a needle with a pair of greased anacondas.

Convinced the idea was a sound one, however, I went outside and nabbed a somewhat feral neighborhood cat, gave him a few bites of ham, then put him (and more ham) in the attic.

It worked. In a way.

The squirrel left. The cat stayed.

A few years back, one of my coworkers told how she and her children arrived home and found their house had been ransacked. Belongings were knocked off the shelves, curtains and pictures hung askew. Broken glass and the contents of spilled containers littered the floor.

Yet the doors were all locked, the windows all closed. The house was totally silent.

Afraid the family’s pet cat had been harmed by the intruder, they did a quick search of the house, and found the cat collapsed against the bathroom wall, panting hard and looking exhausted.

Breathing equally hard against the other wall was the intruder.

A squirrel.

It had apparently squeezed into the house through a small hole in the roof, then had been unable to get back to that hole after the lifelong indoor cat thought its fresh-meat-delivery prayers had been answered.

Based on the extent of the destruction, it appeared squirrel and cat had spent the entire day in a life-and-lunch struggle before such a thorough exhaustion overtook them that all each could manage was to glare at the other.

They grabbed the squirrel by its tail. It dangled limply, too tired to even attempt a bite (or three). They set it free in their yard.

And their cat, watching the-one-that-got-away get away, couldn’t even muster the energy to look annoyed.

For those who know cats, that means “nearly dead.”

It was just a 3″ by 3″ picture in a magazine, but it caught and held my attention in such a way that I decided to visit the magazine’s website to leave a comment about it. A quick note of thanks.

Turns out I was hardly alone.

The Glamour magazine article was about liking yourself as you are, and the photo they chose to illustrate the story was of a model who was laughing while posing in her underwear.

And the model had a stomach that was (gasp!) normal.

I don’t mean normal by model standards. I mean normal as in my-diet-doesn’t-mimic-a-rabbit normal.

Delighted readers began inundating Glamour with notes thanking them for showing a woman’s body “with all the curves and quirks and rolls found in nature,” wrote one.

“It was great to see a healthy woman without her flaws airbrushed out,” wrote another. “It was a bit shocking to see a model with a real-life tummy, which just goes to show how conditioned I am to seeing ‘perfect’ people in magazines. But I loved it! Women are made in so many ways, not in a cookie-cutter format.”

Early this year, dozens of magazines featured Jessica Simpson’s shocking weight gain on their covers. It seems she’d become an atrocity. A monstrosity.  

A size 8.

The thing is–the average U.S. woman is a size 14. Granted, we’re an overweight nation, but even so, I can’t comprehend this bizarre chasm that exists between the real world and the one where fashion designers and casting agents and those types reside.

And I didn’t realize how hungry for validation those in the real world were until I read some of the remarks about the page 194 woman.

“I love how happy she seems, especially given all the negative messages from the fashion industry telling her she is fat and therefore unattractive.”

“This beautiful woman has a real stomach–and did I even see a few stretch marks? This is how my belly looks after giving birth to my two amazing kids! This photo made me want to shout from the rooftops.”

A few years back, Dove started an ad campaign featuring women of many sizes and ages, with the gist of the ads being that the women liked themselves as they were, that they were comfortable in their own skin. It was considered a brave move for Dove, especially since the dirty little secret in the beauty business is that you can’t sell your product if women actually like how they look.

The industry uses ultra-gorgeous, super-skinny models because they think women are vacant enough to believe, “I want to look like her, and if I buy this, I will.”

As our nation has grown larger, models have become smaller, with the average model now weighing 23 percent less than the average woman. Twenty years ago, the average model weighed an average of 8 percent less. Plus, the models in print ads are often Photoshopped to perfection, helping to create a culture of women who are conditioned to see that as the norm. One to which few can measure up.

It’s no wonder eating disorders are rampant. 

Women are clearly hungry for reality, but are being fed a narrow-minded idea of beauty.          

“This one’s a definite for my Monday File,” I said to my husband as he took my place at the computer.

“Is that what you’re calling it now?” asked Geoff. “What happened to-what was it?-your visual antidepressants?”

“Eye Prozac,” I said. “I dunno. Monday File seems to fit better. I need them more at the start of a week.”

I stood behind him as he watched the latest of my growing collection of short YouTube videos that have become my virtual security blanket-what I turn to for comfort when I’m feeling low.

Many of the videos I’m holding on to are ones that have gone viral, the term for content that spreads from one person’s computer to the next faster than swine flu symptoms through a hypochondriac convention. It’s the kind of phenomena that turned Susan Boyle of Britain’s Got Talent into an overnight celebrity and inspired a generation of brides to start choosing their attendants based on how good they can dance.

Right now, my favorite is a video filmed in a train station in Antwerp, Belgium, in March 2009. I’ll briefly describe it.

It’s 8 in the morning and the station is crowded. There’s the usual din of train station noises when all of a sudden, a recording of Julie Andrews singing ‘Do, Re, Mi’ begins playing over the speaker system. A man, dressed like an ordinary traveler, goes to the center of the courtyard and starts dancing. A young girl with a backpack joins him, and then a handful of others, dressed in everyday garb, join in for a wonderfully choreographed, yet totally spontaneous-looking dance.

A swarm of school-aged children starts dancing their way down a wide staircase while other dancers spill in from here and there to join the main group, which has now grown to about 200 participants.

When the song ends, the crowd of dancers disburses so quickly and smoothly that you’d never know the dance had just happened. The spectators are left looking amusingly stunned.

It’s easy to understand why the video went viral, with well over one million views. It was one of those things that, if you allow it, can make you feel good for hours. 

Over the next few days, I noticed I was feeling compelled to watch it again and again, and it wasn’t until I made note of the circumstances surrounding those compulsions that I realized what it was that was drawing me there.

Each time I heard or read something that struck me as particularly barbaric, or news of a child or animals being hurt or mistreated, it was like my mind needed to balance the bad with some good.

That all those people were willing to take the time to learn that dance in order to provide a quick thrill for a bunch of total strangers who didn’t have a clue what was happening-I find that enchanting. Powerful.

Inspiring.

When I allow myself to pay too much attention to the news or our finances or the amount of work needing done, it’s hard not to get down. I need to expand my collection of videos into something that doesn’t require a computer to see. I need a list to remind myself about all the people who mow lawns for elderly neighbors or fix meals for exhausted new parents or tend the graves of total strangers just because someone should. 

People who catch and fix feral cats, who decorate random statues and trees with knitted scarves, who make a point of dropping change in places for children to find. 

Who make things better for others they don’t even know.

They give us a reason to want to join in the dance.